Lo Siento Mi Corazon

Lo siento mi corazon for I have never given you a voice in my life.  It was never because you were never right but I know I was scared you would be wrong.

Lo siento mi corazon for I treated you as if you would never do me any good.  You always have that burning fire that worried me, that you might be too hasty and I would end up dealing with the aftermath.

Lo siento mi corazon for I never believed in you. I guess a part of me was in denial for I truly know what you’re capable of.  I know your strength and it’s overwhelming that I didn’t want to believe it.

Lo siento mi corazon for I have always made decisions that I never even thought of consulting you.  Some of those decisions I know now that you should have been the one to make the call because it broke you in the end. It broke you too many times.

Lo siento mi corazon for causing you your darkest hours.  It must have been hard waking up one day and everything was in total chaos but you had to walk through it.

Lo siento mi corazon for watching you bleed.  I heard you say do something, but that was beyond me.  I knew then no matter how much I would try to stop the bleeding, I can’t.

Lo siento mi corazon for when I finally made you take over and call the shots, it was already the final battle.

Lo siento mi corazon for shutting you out all the time.  I don’t mean to, I guess I have been so overly protective of breaking you, I broke you even harder each time.

Lo siento mi corazon for being stubborn.  I never meant for us to be on opposite sides of anything, but that’s what ends up happening every time.

Lo siento mi corazon for always putting you last.  And because I truly know your strength, I abused it and went to battles that ended up hurting you so bad and left you healing on your own.   Which you have always done ever so gracefully that I got used to it.

Lo siento mi corazon I never wanted you to lose.  But maybe it’s meant to be that way for you to see some things come to light. It may have shown me how strong and brave you are while showing you also that it’s time to let go.

Lo siento mi corazon for blaming you for our 3-days darkness, the clean slate heartbreak and the finale.  I know you should have been the first one I asked forgiveness from, but instead I put you on trial.

Lo siento mi corazon, no lo haré de nuevo.

-juliet 20190524 0221

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